Healing is not linear. Every option available to the kid and to us as parents right now is a rotten option. Nothing makes sense and nothing is clear – actually nothing make sense and the only thing that is clear is our love for this child.
April 5, 2022, 6 years deep into treatment for depression and an anxiety disorder, and just one month into a partial hospitalization program to treat a crisis point in their mental health; my eldest child was officially “stepped down” from the full day program to the afternoon program.
So here’s the thing….if you ask me how I am right now, I will probably answer honestly that I am perpetually exhausted, frustrated by school and insurance systems that make it nearly impossible to get a teenager critical mental health treatment, frightened for my struggling child, worried that my other child is uncomfortable in our home, disheartened by the limited amount of time and energy my husband and I have for each other, and resentful of the fact that our lives are ordered around the schedule of the program. But I’ll also tell you how profoundly thankful I am for the ability to get our child help and how hopeful I remain for brighter days.